Full Moon in Cancer


Night came upon me
Like a blanket of darkness
Threatening to smother my hopes
And dreams as it put my world to bed
Like an exhausted mother does an errant boy
At the end of his hyperactive day.

But no sleep visited upon me for long
As night remained night
And morning would not come
Despite my longings and my begging
To the dark blanket that had found its way
Through my bedroom windows
And wrapped so tightly ‘round my chest
As that bed now became so coffin-like.

No fear I hold of this night though
Unlike the nights that have preceded it
When all my strength and courage pushed
Off the heavy blankets and entangling sheets
Made moist by my fear, my paralyzing fear
As hands clenched so tight to chest
That wakefulness brought numbed arms
And throbbing chest to force out a silent cry
That no one could hear in the vastness of that stillness.

This night is a different though.
Dead are those who terrorized, gone except for memories
And spirits that call my name and ask forgiveness
For sins they did not know they had committed
Until they reached their final judgments.
I hear their pleas and forgive them
A thousand times and yet they do not hear me
In the darkness of this night.

In a full lotus, I sit upon my meditation pillow,
Hearing those voices in unison once again
Making my peace with them in the subdued
Moonlight that gently tumbles from the sky
And fills my den with hope of their redemption.

So many times in sunlight
I have seen all that which I needed to have done
Made so much more vibrantly clear and immediate
During full moon in Cancer.

© 2017 by John David Higham: All Rights Reserved
Photo: Full Moon in Cancer (Seeley Road, 1/12/17)

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